Jewelry, a Box of Wine, a Back Flogger, a Scottish Kilt, and a Goat

Every so often we have to look at the Cruster’s ebay listings to see another fine example of Cruster Math.

Mark sold a pendent on ebay.

5.1 g of 14kt gold

and 1.33 ct of diamonds

5.1 grams of gold into the melters pot goes for $98.06 at todays prices.

Mark sold the piece of jewelery for $152.49

That means that Mark being a RETARDED idiot who will be out of business soon, SOLD 1.33 ct of diamonds for about $50 bucks. WHO IN THEIR RIGHT MIND sells 1.33 ct of diamonds for $50 bucks. I’ll tell you who. A THIEF like the Cruster and GAY BOY NICK who STOLE the merchandise.

Mark is an idiot. If he had half a brain he would have figured out a way to sell the piece of jewelry for the $400 bucks it was worth.

CRUSTER MATH!

Unfortunately, for Mark our little Cruster, the Cash for Gold store opened up right next door to Mark’s business.

Gone are the days of Mark being able to lie to people about the price for their gold when he attempts to steal it from them.

We already have Mark being too scared to make a gold purchase. Case and point when I sent my Minion into Mark’s store with a REAL gold chain to sell, but, Gay Boy Nick, figuring out that the guy was my Minion, screamed at Mark like a bitch that he worked for me, causing Mark to Crust and Flake and GIVE BACK the real gold to my minion screaming, “NOT FOR ME” over and over again until my minion left the store. But thats history.

Now we have no gold for Mark. Why would anybody walk into to Mark’s store, to see a 50 year old man with yellow crusting and flaking skin sitting behind a window wearing a greasy baseball hat and a leeering smile and a store that smells like a cat box due to the large number of cats on the premise instead of walking in to the new Cash for Gold establishment right next door, with a young hottie sitting at the desk offering to buy your gold. I think the young hottie will win out each time. But how is a cruster to eat?

First, the $22,000 worth of melted gold will not go far. When gay boy nickie spends $4900 of it at a sitting at a titty bar, in one sitting, a few more of those outings and mark the cruster has no cash. And believe me, Gay Boy Nick will need to maintain his depraved lifestyle, and without being able to steal from the Holy Goat, the cash will dry up fast.

Mark the Cruster flipped out about the new Cash for Gold place, and tried to do some business by purchasing a Sony laptop computer that some kid stole and brought into mark’s store. But, surprise suprise, the cops know all about Crusty the Fence and immediately contacted Mark and asked about why he purchased the Sony computer that was stolen, which the cops then came by and confiscated.

Its going to be really hard for mark to continue to pay is $1800 a rent when none of his stolen jewelry is selling on eBay, the Cash for Gold placed opened next door, and the cops are now going to ask about everything the Cruster and his Gay Boy Ward purchase.

Its not too late Mark. Suicide will set you free.

Watching the super bowl with my laptop, I thought I would check the Cruster’s ebay listings and see what kind of business he has been doing.

Hmmmm… NOTHING… well almost nothing. In the last week ALL of the Cruster’s stolen jewlery has gone off auction with NO BIDDERS… so sad… OVERPRICED crap with sucky pictures and completely bizare descriptions means no sales.

The only thing that Crusty sold in the last few weeks was a piece of Pewter for $10.49. THAT won’t pay his $1800 a month rent. LOL.

Lets do another quick exercise in Cruster Math:

Take a mens ring that has 7.1 grams of 14kt gold, which the full melt on the gold is $130.

Add a .25 ct. diamond in the middle, which, for those of you who are not jewelers, a .25 ct diamond is SO small that you might not even notice that the ring had a diamond in the center.

Lets not include the cut of the diamond. Is it a round brilliant? Is it a princess cut? who knows.

And lets keep the customer guessing. s1/s2? WHICH IS IT? and H/I? Wow, H/I is YELLOW.

So, who wants to buy a ring for $399 with a a nasty yellow chip of diamond in the middle that has a full melt value of the gold at $130? Apparently NOBODY because it did not sell.

Most people would take that piece of crap ring with a yellow tiny piece of chipped diamond and send it off to the smelter, but, not the crusters.

SO whats mark going to do? With Nick about to goto jail, and the cops breathing down on Marks neck for fencing stolen goods?

Its not going to be a good month for the Cruster. How is he going to pay his $1800 rent?

Remember this crusty: Suicide is Painless you crusting fool.

Get Ready for Jail Nickie… SNIFF the Glove!