I put ads in local newspapers in Kankakee and the boonies that I will be at a hotel. I set up shop at Motel 6 or other dumpy hotels and run ads in newspapers that I buy gold and jewelry.
Old stupid people show up, and I steal their stuff. I pay them virtually nothing for the loot.
And, I bring along my trusty box O’ wine so I can drink myself into oblivion, ever the drunken fool.
Life is great.